9/3/21: on a boat, foggy? when we get to the destination i realize i left all my clothes at the last place and start asking to go back. mountains, churches; one with golden domes.



5/3/21: thinking, "my biggest fear is not being in control [of my body]" before looking in the mirror and questioning if i was -- not for long, almost instantly woke up hyperventilating and/or soaked in a cold sweat. bf comforted me and i went back to sleep easily, think i dreamt of the same thing i do seemingly every single night: boats/the water, and a tall white, sunny apartment in the city. doesn't feel as scary anymore, i want to be there, i want to know what's going on!



29/1/21: somehow familiar pink bathroom stalls. feels like summer, my old laundry room, strange cats coming in but they have the same dumb faces; one a patchy grey-black, the other(s?) peach and white who i get confused with pompom.



18/1/21: keep having vague dreams of familiar locations; a trailer, the same apartment [i dont know theyre all white and high up], the same barn? do i have to choose betwen lucid dreams and smoking weed? can i not hav both??????



27/12/20: in an old, dark house with ornate arched windows but it's really high up. someone else is there, a woman. the floor starts to shake, i look out the window and only see a train. [read about train derailments all afternoon]



???: only vaguely remember my dreams but found a theme starting in march [maybe earlier, idk] of an apartment in paris -- always bright, always with paityn, always a ledge, always someone watching? in the march dream there was a protest outside -- i don't remember exactly but in my other dreams it does always seem chaotic ["crowded,scary,ugly,dirty"].... sitting in chairs drinking gatorade! edit: april 2019 is the first instance on my phone - 'in france, crowded, cramped apartment, go on the roof think im ginna die' i'm goung crazy now! other themes are cruises, grocery stores/gas stations, islands, thailand, hotels, impossible road trips, pageants, and shoplifting



20/11/20: ostensibly in slovenia, four or five kittens, ostensibly drunk, everyone says there's still only two



8/11/20: carrying pompom in a big, blue(?) barn that is connected to other barns, red and black. catch a glimpse of a big black cat -- processed it as a cougar though that's clearly not the case -- scream even though i know i shouldn't. run out of the barn, it comes after me while i'm attacked by something else outside.